Newspaper spottings

Public Notices in my small towns local paper this week...

As customary due to hot weather, Trash pickup will be one hour early.
Reasons why? Not sure, but here are my guesses:

Trash gets stinky in the heat.

Trash guys gets stinky in the heat (here in OK ,they don't insist on being called "Sanitation Engineers")

Trash guys know that cold beer tastes better in hot weather. The sooner Miller time arrives, the better.

Trash guys need an extra hour to pickup the trash, since hot weather somehow generates more trash.

Cemetery Association - NOTICE - Effective July 1, 2005
The price on cemetery plots will increase from $150 to $300 each.
For more information contact Ross Adam or Chris Cochran.
Wonder what caused them to double the prices. $5 or $10 or even $50 more I can understand. But DOUBLE!
I suggest going over to the next town to be buried. Save yourself $150