Heelies

No offense Oklahoma, but the health insurance options you offer to your state employees, bites the big one. In the 7.5 years I worked at the corporate cube farm job, through all three different insurance companies we switched to, through two babies, several procedures, dozens of office visits, specialist referrals, etc. -- we never had the issues we've suffered through with this state sponsored plan.

With that in mind, and with the medical bill soul train still rolling through our house due to PK's early summer arm break, it was with much apprehension and caution that we viewed C's latest want-need-justgottahave acquisition....Heely's.

Yes, those same gizmos that her 1st grade teacher's youngest son broke his leg with.

Yes, those death trap shoes with wheels in the heel that come packaged with a first aid kit and more warning labels than a Glock 9mm.

Yes, those fashionably hip cross bred footwear that some genetic scientist will someday use to create a gene that allows wheels to grow in place of heel bones.

C has been spotting kids wearing them for several years now and since growing tired of launching her Razr scooter off of curbs, making breaking skid marks in our driveway with her bike, popping wheelies (I'm not kidding) in her sister's battery operated jeep, and spinning 42 times in a row on her roller blades - without getting dizzy, or so she claims -- she was ready to graduate to the wheel-heeled footwear.

Since our policy of non-holiday/non-birthday instantly approved purchases normally includes any apparatus that involves physical activity (exercise) or scholastic aptitude enrichment (pick a book, any book), it would seem to include these heeled rubber souls.

But at $60 (plus tax) a pair, we balked a bit, thinking that it would have to wait for her next birthday.

However, when C's 2nd grade teacher asks her to write an essay, this being the first day of her school year, with the topic heading, "What I did this summer....", among other things C will write will be the following...Read 6 chapter books for $1 a piece - received $2 for Black Beauty because my Dad thought it was really depressing and thought I should get double for getting through it.

Made my bed almost every day, almost every week, almost every month, for the last 3 months and got a quarter every time I did it.

Went off the high diving board at the pool as many times as I needed to get $5 from my Dad...at a quarter for each time I went off.

Picked about a bucket of tomatoes a week from our garden, for a $1 a bucket.

Practiced the typing game on my computer and got a quarter for every letter memorized. I know a,s,d,f,g, h,j,k,l,;, q,w,e,r,t,y u,i,o, p, space bar, shift key, tab, return, and delete, for a total of $6.25. If I learned them all before school started, I would have gotten a $10 bonus from Dad, but I didn't, so I didn't. How unfair.

Got a quarter for every kiddie book I read to my little sister. Some days I'd read a bunch, and some days just one or two.
By the time she was ready to go back-to-school clothes shopping last week, she had saved up $57 toward the purchase of her Heely's. On a recent trip to the mall, my M-i-L made up the difference and she came home, wheelin' and a dealin', spouting promise after promise that she wouldn't go down any steep hills while wearing them.

I was getting ready to call a few parents I knew whose kids had some experience with these little rolling thunders (including the broken leg kid) to give C a lesson or two on how to get moving on these things.

To which C replied with a few dozen roll-bys (both forward and backward), a half-spin, and several examples of how to do emergency stops.

I hung up the phone. I should have known.