Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Bootstraps vs. Fingerholes

We are fortunate in our small town to have a Western Wear shop. However, since no one in my immediate family are farmers, ranchers, horse trainers, or do anything that could be considered western in any way, we have yet to visit our local "hat 'n boot 'n wrangler" store.

Until last weekend.

For a family outing, we decided to head down to the bustling town of Duncan to tour the Chisholm Trail Heritage Center. My wife is a theme type of person, so of course, the girls had to get on their best cowboy get'ups. C had on some fringey pants that S had picked up at a thrift store back in LA awhile back for a $1. In addition to her "chappettes," she adorned a white tee, beige button up shirt, faux-suede hat, with her hair in dueling braids -- she looked the part.

Right down to her purple crocs.

A quick stop at the local Western Wear shop would remedy the fashion emergency.

C picked out a pair of green and light brown leather boots, that looked pretty darn cute on her. As the young, western wear clerkette helped my eldest daughter fit the $35 dead-cow footwear, I noticed four holes neatly sewn into the top of each boot, two holes on opposing sides.

I innocently asked what the deal was with those holes.

Tin foot. Rookie. Outsider. Never bought a boot in his life city slicker.

My wife grinned, came over to give my pathetic torso a hug and said, "oooh, how cute you are to ask that?"

The clerkette grinned and shook her head.

Even my 6-year old gave me that same condescending smile, as she said, "Daddy, those are for your fingers to pull the boots up."

Then the clerkette went on to display and demonstrate to me the two main methods of pulling on one's boots.

The tried and true "boot strap," which consists of two ringlettes of doubled-over and sewn together leather, firmly attached to the top rim of the boot. A cow-person simply needed to grab a'hold of each strap and exert extreme force to insert said foot into said boot.

The finger holes served the same purpose, only one needed to insert one's forefinger and middle fingers into the opposing two holes, and with similar upward motion and force, insert said foot into said boot.

Obviously where the phrase, "pulling yourself up by your boot straps" was derived.

Although, I've never heard the phrase, "pulling yourself up by your boot holes," for equally obvious reasons.

BTW, PK looked adorable in her denim overalls with cowboys all over them, a red, white and blue gingham shirt, braided hair and red boots...wait, did I just spew the word "adorable" and correctly spell the word "gingham?"

Time to go wrench on the elky, me thinks.

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